Saturday, September 29, 2012

This is the start of something new

Can I just say how much I adore Ed Sheeran?

I heard an office phone ringing in my sleep while I was drifting back and fourth from consciousness. And then I wondered, why would there be an office phone ringing? So I got up sleepily and realized it was the alarm of my phone. Made a note to myself to change the ringing tone because this one plays like a lullaby. I looked at the time and it was 5:30 in the morning. There's usually no reason whatsoever for me to get up this early in the morning but today, I was going to be on live TV for the first time on my own!!!!!! (A huge thanks to Jasmine for helping me get this!) I was going to be on Hello On Two that showed on RTM 2 at 7. Jasmine would talk about the youth festival and I would sing. We drove a long way to the RTM studios and found our way to the studio. It was big. Big as in massively huge with different blocks and many levels and entrances. We walked up to the reception area and someone found us. Thank goodness, because we would've been lost and wandering aimlessly around this gigantic place. I walked into a dressing room and a lady put make-up on me with all sorts of brushes I thought would be better for painting. I was getting really nervous. Also it was really freezing cold in there and when we rushed out of the house, I forgot my hoodie. Man, did I wish I had it with me then. The two hosts were reading the headlines of several papers and I was led to a stool in the corner where I set up. There isn't much to set up since its just me and my guitar, so I just sat there. Then it came my turn to sing. There were three cameras pointing at me and I was so confused which one to look at. I told myself to smile, but I wasn't sure if it could hide my nervousness. It felt like it flew by so fast and before I knew it, I was done singing. It was a blast. Just that few minutes, it was so worth it. Like after so many times having things not work out, I felt like they were falling apart, and this week, all the shattered pieces are slowly, very slowly falling into place.

Monday was a rush. Literally and figuratively. An emotional roller coster and also a mad rush to school. The train got delayed, as usual but I made it to school in time.
The past few days were filled with mad, crazy studying, because there was a biology test coming up and the passing mark is 65 percent. I read the chapters from 1-5 and took notes, loads of notes and tried to remember the different classifications of animals like mammals, birds, amphibians, reptiles, arthropods, arachnids, nematodes and soooo soo, so on. I studied about batch culture and mycoproteins, benedict tests, emulsion tests, dicotyledonous and monocotyledonous plants.
I have never, ever studied this hard for a test. Ever. Then the papers were placed on our desks. All of the above I studied for did not end up in the test. So the two hours was spent with me basically digging every corner of my brain trying to see how much I retained during the lessons in my sub consciousness. Turns out, not much. Detailed images of the cells I drew in my notebook but no labels to tell be which is what. I've never felt so tired after school. I fell asleep in the car on the way to KL. I was going to perform at the opening of FEYST. An indie youth festival filled with music, arts, video games and loads more. What was even better was that there were actually people watching. Actual strangers, not the people my mom brought plus member of the media. I sang a malay song without even knowing what I was singing about. From what I understood, it is about facebook love. I think.

I hope someday when the time comes and when I inevitably reach a crossroad between music full time and a sustainable full time job, I hope I'd get to do music. I can't imagine wanting to do anything else with my life. But at the same time, I can't help but wonder what if it doesn't work? Then again, if I stop myself at 'what if' I would never know.


Next week (Wednesday) I will be on air on RED FM (!!!!) around 8pm. I still can't bring myself to believe that this is actually real.
Tune in maybe?
104.9 fm.

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